Have faith because I know everything is going to be all right.
In the bottom of my heart I know, it is all going to be ok and I know many women that are now finally embracing their children and that their struggle was really worth it. However when you are in the mist of the process it can be really difficult. It has been for me, for many years, and for many women who seek my help filled up with hope and good intentions, opened to receive a new treatment and finally being able to really get pregnant and finally birth their dream, becoming mothers at the end of this long and challenging excursion. Personally I have 2 parts constantly working inside me: do the best you can to make it happen and then completely forget about it. The second part is quite complicated as for most of the women I know the condition of NOT having a child represent a deep, huge, painful emptiness, almost like a deep grief that won't allow you to BE without IT. It is like perceiving yourself not as a WOMAN but as a NON MOTHER, as if you are missing something, without being able to enjoy the fact that you are an adult and in the meantime you can do whatever you want and that other people with kids can NOT. Countless time people with kids / the others / talk to you as if you are super lucky as you can have sex in the middle of the kitchen, screaming to the roof, nobody cares, children are not there... Or that they have kind of superpower because they are parents, and you can never really have the idea because you don't know what does it mean. And when you talk about your cat, which is the closest thing to a kid you have, they look at you with a look that to me sounds "how you dare to even talk about your cat, I am talking about MY CHILD", I know, I would like to, I am not in the position to do so! I would like to share with you some considerations, if you are in the same path, you might find yourself interested in some or all the steps I worked out. If you are not in this path, maybe some friends or relatives of yours are, and this can be interesting to consider other point of views.
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May 2018
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